Friday, October 4, 2013

An Adoption Story | The Northcutt Family

It is our absolute joy to introduce you guys to Craig, Angela, and Jaxon Northcutt. DJ and I know the Northcutts because Craig works on staff with us at The Village as our Facilities Director. Craig was a great resource for us when we were in the very beginning stages of considering adoption and Angela has been a sweet encouragement to me along the way. Their story is a sweet one that has opened our eyes and hearts to the beautiful redemption that can occur through Open Adoption. For those who don't know, Open Adoption is a form of adoption in which the biological and adoptive families have access to varying degrees of each others' personal information and have an option of contact. In Open Adoption, the adoptive parents hold all the rights as the legal parents, yet the individuals of the biological and adoptive families may exercise the option to open the contact in varying forms: from just sending mail and/or photos, to face-to-face visits between birth and adoptive families. DJ and I were once uneducated about and fearful of Open Adoption, but the Northcutt's story has opened our hearts to its great benefits and blessings. We pray their story encourages your hearts as much as it does ours. 

We are excited that DJ and Courtney have asked us to share our story. We love the awareness their blog has brought and how it’s given people a way to support adoption. Adoption is so dear to us because it’s how the Lord grew our family and how He brought our hearts closer to Him.

Even before we were married, we discussed the possibility of adoption; however, we always talked about adopting after we had biological children. After three years of marriage, we started trying for a baby. Months turned into a year and then we sought medical treatment. We went through three rounds of minor fertility treatments, each time praying and hoping it would end with a pregnancy.

When our third treatment was unsuccessful, we were left with a decision: pursue more invasive medical treatment or pursue adoption. We knew that financially, emotionally and physically, we could only pursue one wholeheartedly but at the time we didn’t know which one. Over the next three months, we prayed, asking the Lord to guide. After that time, we both felt He confirmed that adoption was to be our journey.

But, we didn’t know where to start. We were overwhelmed with the choices: different types of adoption and different agencies. We started with an agency that many friends had used in their foster-to-adopt program. We filled out paperwork, attended a great training but left feeling unsettled; this wasn’t for us. 

We then looked into an agency that offered a domestic infant adoption program – an open adoption program. We didn’t even know what open adoption meant. We thought it couldn’t hurt to learn more so we signed up for a training seminar with the agency. The training shed light on open adoption, addressed our concerns and fears and dispelled any myths we had heard. We drove home – both with tears in our eyes – knowing that this is what the Lord wanted for us.

Paperwork was filled out, and then we were left waiting. And waiting. It was much harder than we could have imagined. Our hearts felt like we were ready, but the Lord continued to say “not yet.” We were notified a few times of emergency placements that never went beyond an email or phone call.

Six months into our waiting, we got a joyous call: an expectant couple wanted to meet us. We met with the couple and all agreed to move forward as though the adoption was going through. A few days later, we met a beautiful baby girl in the hospital. We held her, fed her, sat with her and her mother, all the time hopeful that she was going to be ours. That night we received a phone call that the parents had decided they weren’t going to place the baby for adoption. A week that began with so much excitement ended in crushing sadness.

In the midst of the hurt and sadness, the Lord provided. He took a situation we didn’t think we were strong enough to handle, and He sustained. Even though our prayers for a child weren’t answered, He was faithful. Our hearts were sad, but we still felt hope.

We took time to grieve this loss, and then three months later we got a call about an expectant mom across the state wanting to meet us. We had a great meeting with the mom and grandmother, which led to dinner and then a doctor’s appointment the next week. We were blessed to be able to build a relationship with this birth family even before the baby was born.

A day before the baby was due, we made the trip once again hoping that when we drove home, we would be a family of three. The next day, our sweet Jaxon Craig was born. His birth mom was gracious to make us a part of the time in the hospital, and we have many sweet memories of that time with Jaxon and her. Three days after Jaxon was born, the placement was final, and we were able to bring our son home.

The Lord has been faithful to grow our family, not just with a son but with a relationship with his birth family as well. He has also allowed us to see how adoption is much more than receiving the gift of a child… Experiencing the feeling of longing, seeing the pain that comes with sacrifice and the love and joy that come when a child becomes yours. He took something that we wanted, longed for, waited for and then gave us so much more.


Spirit lead where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever you would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In presence of my Savior
(Oceans by Hillsong United

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